Embrace the ME not the We

I know there are very few ladies out there that enjoy being single. I also know plenty that are wild and happy singles, but in reality Why else would we go out? Yeah, of course we love our  lady friends and girl time, but we all still have the hopes of meeting someone interesting too. Some of us suffer from lilly padding from one serious thing to the next. Which brings me to if you’re newly single enjoy being a ME when the opportunity is there.

As someone who is a lillypad hopper… I realized after my break up I didn’t even know what I wanted because what I thought I wanted wasn’t my reality anymore. Now that I’ve been single for 6 months I can’t really imagine giving it up that easily.

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1. I REALLY love my friends.

It’s very common to ignore your friends once you meet someone new because it does take a lot of time and effort in a fresh relationship. I love hanging out with my friends and at this point I can’t split my time.

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2. You were probably more interesting until I got to know you.

Having a casual conversation and covering the bases on the surface of their life he/she might seem great. But after a month I’m going to realize you aren’t as cool and interesting as I thought you would be… It’s like when you read the back of a book and get so excited upon purchase then it has no development and sucky ending. (Don’t online date)

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3. I’m not really interested in our friends meeting.

There is always a birthday party that they are invited to and you’re the plus one. Everyone knows each other and then I come off as the anti-social bitch. Suffering from social anxiety and large groups of strangers.. I need a freaking roofie please.

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4. Not really into seeing your place.

This goes both ways. Many people that I know that find living habits the deal breaker. Mine is always roommates. I understand the cost of living is a struggle. However, you having roommates is equivalent to living at home. It feels like being 18 again tip toeing into your place. I’m a grown woman if I want to tap dance in my heels  at 3 am on your hardwoods and not worry about waking up Sally. I also trip and run into walls frequently. Not suited for a quiet environment.

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5. Work issues.

I work in a film industry my schedule isn’t super flexible so if you’re available for lunch on a Tuesday… I probably will never have time for you. Work sometimes isn’t what drives people, but for some of us it’s priority #1.

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6. I don’t want a nickname.

Seriously, don’t call me baby. Hi – I am Sarah.

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7. Need my alone time. 

I talk to myself daily. It gets weird when other people are around while you are trying to have a conversation with yourself (Mainly, I talk to myself because my thoughts are so scattered that saying it out loud makes me focus on one topic). Sometimes it’s necessary to just hang out with your best friend – Yourself! Because if you can’t be alone with you, chances are no one else is going to enjoy one on one company either.

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I don’t mean to come off bitter or bashing on relationships. My friend’s currently  in relationships/married are amazing, and I fall under the spell of being super envious. My point is to  embrace the time you have alone because we can get caught up in the idea of being in a committed relationship, and settle for something we truly do not want. No matter what your stance is on relationships – THEY ARE WORK! It’s like the stairmaster, it doesn’t matter if you are on level 1 you will break a sweat. So spend time stretching and breathing before you dive in deep.

 

Don’t sell yourself cheap… breathe, relax, and have fun! 
Patience is a virtue which most of us do not possess.

Written by: Ordinary Lady Sarah
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I have given up on being original and accepted I’m an extra dose of ordinary.
Consider myself a creator of false worlds working on the TV show Revenge in the Set Decorating Department.
There will never come a time in my life where I believe women shouldn’t be helping women.
Started blogging because being opinionated on my facebook status was getting old.

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Being Insecure makes us successful

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I think we have all been coached since birth to believe in ourself, have an abundant amount of confidence. If we ever doubt ourself, Thankfully, we  have parents who reassured us we were God’s gift to earth since they produced us. Over the past 6 months I have been going through crazy changes in my life that have created a world of insecurities.

It’s hard to talk about your insecurities because I am pretty positive that people do not see our own personal battles going on. To talk about it publicly or shed light on the issues is exposing that vulnerability, and if they never noticed it before you have now put a magnify glass on it.
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The truth is I feel bad for people who have too much confidence to admit they are insecure. Insecurity is what makes us successful in life.
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 We as a society have had it all wrong believing you need to be overly confident and self assured to be successful. Wrong, being insecure always has us pushing ourselves to do better keeps us creative and hungry for more. People who think they have it all or are too confident can’t grow as a person. They lack the ability to be open minded and see outside of themselves. I don’t believe that some of the greatest artists in the world made such masterpieces because they knew they had talent, and believed what they were doing would make history. Insecurities are scary and lonely, but it builds a thick skin for life, all of those emotions and fears can be translated into something wonderful.
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So I say be a little less confident. Do something that makes you feel insecure. Be scared because going through life playing is safe is no way to be successful, and it’s not living. 

My soul was mating with New York

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This post was completely difficult to write about, and it took me a few days to compose my feelings, memories, and photographs. To begin on

{ W H Y  } I decided to travel for 10 days in this city, starts off with being invited to a wedding. The remainder of my time was going to be spent on having the opportunity to do something nice for myself. Recently being broken up with gets you down in the dumps and I thought what better way to start my journey as a ME then to spend alone time in a city that never sleeps.

Here We Go

The Newly Weds

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A few months back I was invited to a wedding for Brian and Keith in New York City. The ceremony took place in central park! Such a magical experience to be not only in the presence of love but to be in one of the most beautiful parts of this city. It sounds cliche to say but words can not explain what emotions you feel watching two people share the love they have and also committing  their lives to one another. These two guys really know how to throw an epic wedding and reception. Forever thankful for the invitation.

Manhattan Life 

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Typical Tourist Behavior To start my Journey.

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Central Park Strolls As a teenager I never had a strong desire to read novels. Pressured by reading lists in high school I fell in love with Jane Austen. Most of my inspirations in life come from wanting to be a cool chick like her. So taking long romantic walks in the park alone is probably the closest connection I will have to her. But I’ll take it.

The Met 

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 I started my journey early because I had to check out of my hotel so I grabbed a coffee and snack to walk 2 miles. Once I arrived I sat on the Met steps just like Blair Waldorf (living out my gossip girl fantasy moments) finishing off my coffee.

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I love oil paintings. I love thick gold frames. I love collages of photos on the wall. Paint this wall black and let this be my living room. Who needs a TV when you can discuss such wonderful pieces of art?

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I use to work for a designer

who told me to stop looking down and start looking up.

Best advice ever! My fantasy in life would be to have this ceiling and long hallways.

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This was the ONLY Fresco I remember from one of my extensive art classes. I felt very smart and cultured for 30 seconds.

The walk back from the Met ….. This was actually probably the scariest experience of my life. That sunday was the Puerto Rican parade which was taking place on 5th ave. I am not the best in large crowds just because I do get overwhelmed by huge groups of people, but I wasn’t really concerned because “Hey, I am in New York Baby.” However, I did not know that Puerto Rican’s were HUGE FANS OF SNAKES. So I am walking through crowds of drunk people dancing away and I feel something kind of taping my head every few seconds. Since this is a tree lined side walk I thought maybe I was having some leaves dropping into my hair and went to brush it off. To my surprise it wasn’t a leaf, Oh no, it was a freaking snake’s head from the man standing behind me. Yes, people a SNAKE WAS POKING MY HEAD (I have a real fear of snakes like can’t even see them on TV). So I rushed off to get away from him, but it was like once I saw the first one I began to notice all of them. I am not exaggerating when I say they were everywhere, even a man opened a cooler with snakes in them to pass out like a party favor. As soon as I got out of the park I ran to the nearest bar and ordered a big girl drink. Literally, the scariest experience of my life.

In the Sky

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This rooftop had the most amazing views of the sunset which was accompanied by an amazing cocktail.

The Empire State Building

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Reflecting back to my whole Affair to Remember and Gossip Girl days … I was ecstatic to be this high in the sky with the romantic views of this concrete jungle. Being such a huge fan of architecture it was very impressive to see man’s creation. However, I did have slight anxiety looking down. Being an over thinker it made my mind drift to the victims of 911 and the terror they must have felt being this high up. It made me remember the importance of keeping those people in my hearts and remember them on the day they lost their lives.

Lower East Side Life

Baby Cakes – All vegan all gluten free

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Need I say more? This was the cutest little bake shop ever. Also, having food allergies makes most sweet treats off limits. Have no fear of  the millions questions on what ingredients  are used. EVERYTHING’s DAIRY FREE and GLUTEN FREE oh did I mention Tastes AMAZING! Also, having  a nice little coffee with almond milk helps to  wash it all down.

Hotel Chantelle

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What a magical little rooftop bar with CHARMING tables and floors. I came here on Saturday for brunch where they play LIVE Jazz music and have 92 cent drinks. Yes, I repeat 92 Cent drinks! Not only is that the perk, but if you love seafood well you are in for a treat. They have a great affordable raw bar menu. I think we spent 4 hours here listening to the beautiful music, enjoying the weather, and getting drunk for 5 dollars.

Grand Central Station

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This is a destination you have to look up and admire the beautiful architecture and lighting. It’s such a romantic atmosphere with the vaulted ceilings and oversized chandeliers. Reminded me a little bit of the castle from a fairy tale.

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This charming Oyster Bar has been open for over a 100 years. My friend Rachel told me her grandfather had to travel into the city for work and would stop off here and grab some oysters before heading back home. A little piece of family history in this beautiful establishment.

HELLLLLLLOOOOO BROOOKLYN 

Being overly excited about staying in Brooklyn for 8 days is the understatement of the year in my life.

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Crossing over to the beautiful and wonderful city of BROOKLYN leaving Manhattan in dust. Visiting New York City was a vacation me and mom always took. However, we never made it to the other side of the bridge. This was my first time crossing over the bridge and I think I did it with too much joy. I was so happy to finally pretend to be a Brooklyn Girl!

Greenpoint 

Let me just start by saying I chose to hang out in Greenpoint because I heard it was super hipstery. To be honest this is where Hannah lives in Girls and like why would I not pretend to be her for a day or two? The HARDEST part about traveling alone is not having anyone to take your pictures. It was a selfie central outside of Hannah and Marnie’s Apartment.

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Cafe Grumps – Ray’s Place

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Aside from GIRLS – this is hipster central. I just looked around and said “these are my people.”

Bar Hopping is REQUIRED HERE. 

The Bounty 

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This Charming Little Restaurant & Bar was a great find to start the night off. They have a roasted cauliflower, rice, and sautéed greens plate which is great with one of their local cocktails. If you’re a meat eater there are plenty of options on here for you!

The Pencil Factory 

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This little slice of heaven for all walks of life. This bar is in a old pencil factory and has some unique qualities. There is exposed brick, string lighting, multi-level, and did I mention 33 beers on tap? It’s a great place to get a drink, admire cool decor, and meet interesting locals.

Black Rabbit 

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This is a local bar and they know when you are not a local. Mainly, because you order a Whiskey and Ginger Pure and it’s shots NOT a drink. Also, when you drink the Whiskey first then Ginger that’s so “not local.” Learned the hard way. They have a really cute outdoor patio for the day time!

Oak & Iron

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This bar does allow dogs. Which is amazing right? Upon arrival there was a german shepherd at the bar. Felt too weird to ask for a photo of proof for my fellow bloggers This was the last stop of the night and the bartender was so friendly he gave us a free drink. Must check this place out the decor was very awesome.

Here is some GREAT STREET ART on the way to the subway. 

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#aintNOPARTYlikeAGreenpointPARTY

Williamsburg

Sweet Chick

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Cute little brunch place to come grab some Chicken and Waffles or a Kale BLT salad. Fantastic Bloody Mary’s they are almost a meal by themselves.

Berry Park

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This was nice little bar I checked out. I heard they had a great rooftop bar. Unfortunately, the night I went it started to rain. There was so much overcast I couldn’t see that million dollar view. The bar downstairs was awesome and I got to watch the Spurs beat the heck out of the Heat!

Cafe De La Esquina 

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A cute little outdoor mexican restaurant where on Tuesdays all drinks are 4$ Seriously! The tacos are amazing and the atmosphere is perfect for lunch or when the sunsets great outdoor lighting.

 Botanical Gardens / Park Slope 

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This was a Jane Austen moment for me. Beautiful gardens tucked away here in Brooklyn. Walking around the neighborhood you would never imagine this was hiding behind the walls. Great place to come and enjoy a nice stroll with your lunch. No alcohol allowed  (checked first)

The Mets 

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Had a great opportunity to check out the METS play while I was visiting. All thanks to my awesome wedding date! Also, they have a HEALTH BAR where you can get your veggie and gluten free on. Two Ladies were very happy to enjoy a hot dog and cider like normal americans.

Extra Info on My Journey 

Learning the subway systems & catching a few good views of the city

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Walking, Walking, Walking. It’s all I really did & I loved IT!

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Goodbye Brooklyn 

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Saying goodbye to New York (especially Brooklyn) was hard. I mean really hard. What I realized though was for the first time in along time I actually had a dream worth chasing again. I was inspired by this city and literally everything I did was an experience. Everyone had told me there would come a time when I would begin to heal my wounds from my break up and be content with moving on. This journey really set that in motion for me. For the first time in many years I actually did something for myself instead of someone else.

It was liberating.

The medicine for life is adventure, and to do something scary on your own was rewarding for me. It gave me a sense of confidence I did not have  in a while.

I say if you get the chance to travel. DO IT. Even if it’s alone or in a city where you only know a few people. It’s not that scary to sit in a restaurant alone or  grab a book and lay in a park for a few hours. Loving yourself & being true to yourself is the only way you will make it in this world happy!

Stay Adventurous!

Written by: Ordinary Lady Sarah Screen Shot 2014-05-29 at 6.30.41 PM I have given up on being original and accepted I’m an extra dose of ordinary. Consider myself a creator of false worlds working on the TV show Revenge in the Set Decorating Department. There will never come a time in my life where I believe women shouldn’t be helping women. Started blogging because being opinionated on my facebook status was getting old.